原创 内涵段子：我和闺蜜昨晚喝多了，是经理把我送回的宿舍！
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2年前 (2025-01-03)
原标题：内涵段子：我和闺蜜昨晚喝多了，是经理把我送回的宿舍！
1、今天我陪老婆去买菜，看见是一孩子看的摊，老婆问一只鸡多少钱。孩子说23块，我问那两只鸡多少钱，那孩子愣了一下，一时间没算出来，机智道一次只能买一只……一只
2、马上要放暑假了，学校门口多出了好多发小广告的都是各种各样的补习班。今早我去送孩子被发传单的盯上了，我告诉他我家孩子报了班了，他不死心追着我屁股后面非要给我讲讲他们补习班的优点，我走几步他跟几步他穷追不舍我就到处猛躲，我骑着电动车一拐弯撞上了路边的电线杆，他一看这情况立马溜了……
3、一位妇女抱着小孩站在银行的窗口前，那小孩正一边吃着面包卷，一边把面包卷从窗口塞给出纳员，出纳员微笑着摇了摇头。“亲爱的别这样。”孩子的母亲说。然后她又转身对出纳员说：“对不起孩子刚去过动物园。”
4、毕业典礼上，校长宣布全年级第一名的同学上台领奖，可是连续叫了好几声之後，那位学生才慢慢的走上台。后来老师问那位学生，说∶”怎么了？是不是生病了？还是刚才没听清楚？”学生答∶”不是的，我是怕其他同学没听清楚。”
5、下个月有两个闺蜜要结婚，都抢着要我去当伴娘，给我那个激动的啊，我打电话告诉我妈，我妈就说：不找你找谁啊，花钱都得请你呢！我很开心的说：真的吗，我真的那么抢手吗?妈妈嗯了一声，说：谁让你长的那么丑。
6、初中时候我同学没等到放学就提前走了，然后被藏在门后面的老师抓住了，老师找了家长谈话，我同学到家心惊胆战的看到父亲，父亲说了一句让他一辈子忘掉不了的话：“真差劲逃课还能让老师抓住。”
7、我：“经理，这不是我的毛豆吗？”经理：“昨晚你喝高了，我把你送回宿舍，你叫我在车上等会，然后塞给我一罐毛豆，非说是珍藏多年的冬虫夏草！那个，心意我领了，毛豆还给你！”我…..
8、“扎头发，两圈太松，三圈太紧”“洗澡，往左一点烫死，往右一点冻死”“吃方便面，一桶吃不饱，两桶吃不完”“校园小路，两格一步太娘，三格一步太扯……”活着真TM纠结！
9、七夕那天看完电影，在KFC吃完一个蛋挞一个鸡肉卷他说：“我给你去买个甜筒好不好”她说：“不吃，我要吃烤翅”他说：“吃甜筒吧，吃点冷的。”她说：“烤翅！都说了要烤翅！”最后没办法他走到点餐台边问：“服务员，你们有办法把戒指塞进烤翅里吗？”
10、初中时，有人跟班主任举报厕所有八个男生躲厕所里抽烟，班主任气的三步并两步走到厕所前堵在门口，出来一个抽个耳光，直到第九声耳光后，传来班主任的道歉声：“不好意思，校长，没看清楚是你。”校长捂着脸委屈的说：“这巴掌挨得冤，我真的没抽烟……”
幽默笑话：我准备去参加相亲，女方是我老妈前男友的女儿！返回搜狐，查看更多
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